Challenge: STEW ON THIS for Thursday, December 15, 2011: “The unsaid, for me, exerts great power.” Louise Gluck. Describe a scene, hinting at without broadcasting what is going on.
Entry #1: Still drenched in sweat from her daily 3 mile run, Beth stood in front of the refrigerator, feeling the cool air caress her skin. The sights and smells sickened her as much as they brought her joy; tart apples, spicy chili, the juicy steak that her parents had brought home last night after eating out. They all called to her, to the part of her that she had been trying to kill for so long. The hunger, the need to be satiated, the desire to be filled with warmth. Looking longingly at the feast before her, the voice, that horrible voice that was part her and part something else - something deeper, something from the raw, hurt part of her - screamed out, telling her to stop. She heard the same message that played over and over in her head - I have no control over anything if I can't control my own body. Slowly closing the door to the refrigerator, she instead changed into her bathing suit and went to the pool and starting swimming the 100 laps that were her punishment for almost giving in to the basal desires of her body. Her mother glanced out at the pool and wondered idly if Beth had lost weight, but her pager sounded and she headed out, back to the hospital to work more overtime. Her husband had left for another conference early this morning, and would be gone for several days. They were both so proud that they could give Beth everything that money could buy. They wouldn't realize that material things can not take the place of love until it was too late. Too late for them - and much too late for Beth.
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Entry #2: The bright sunshine made her squint as she stepped off the plane. Slipping her sunglasses on, she looked around in amazement at the beauty surrounding her. Every color seemed so much more vivid here than it did in the city and the air seemed cleaner, more refreshing. The light sparkled on the ocean as lazy waves washed up on the beach. She knew it was going to be perfect, just like she had always dreamed it would be. Looking down at her hand, she again marveled how one small circle of gold could change her life so much. The diamond glittered as she moved her hand, looking at it from every view.
Sitting in a booth that overlooked the beach, she tried to be patient as she waited for him to meet her. He had arrived early to make sure everything was in order; she knew he would never let her have anything that was less than perfect. Looking out, she saw his driver pull up in his limo, and she picked up her bag and headed out to meet him. These two days without him had seemed like an eternity, but she knew it would be worth the wait. As she approached the car, his mother stepped out, looking years older than her actual age. "I don't know how to tell you this," she said, "but there's been an accident."
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Entry #3: The kids were running wild today, as usual, and she was exhausted; worn down, burned out, and sick of the whole thing. Mama had been right about Jimmy, he had given her four children in five years, and then moved on to the tarty little waitress from the club. She brought the mail in and sat down at the table, noting again that she needed to get that rickety leg on the chair fixed somehow. Shuffling through the pile of mail, most of them marked "final notice", she once again tried to figure out where the money was going to come from. Working full time at that crappy little market for minimum wage, plus part time sweeping up the hair in the salon just didn't bring in enough money. Jimmy had never sent a dime for child support, and although the social worker said that they would be getting the money from him soon, they hadn't come through for her yet. She knew that they wouldn't get much from him anyway; what he didn't spend on beer he spent at the track.
Marissa, her eldest, came in and put down an envelope in front of her. "Mama, I'm sorry I couldn't get you much for your birthday," she said. She opened the envelope and pulled out a handmade card with a lotto ticket inside. The card read "Even if this ticket isn't a winner, you are a winner to me. Love, Marissa." Tears in her eyes, she stood up and hugged her daughter. Marissa took her hand and led her into the living room to watch the numbers being drawn, both hoping fate would be kind to them today.
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